I WILL PWN U: The First Edition

The art scene’s full of rules and nuances that baffle most outsiders. I’ve given up attempts at explaining to my parents the etiquette of cheek kissing people I hate or why net artists have David Lynch/Kramer/Hitler Youth haircuts. Spending just a few months in art school or attending several gallery openings should give anyone enough background to understand all the underrated skills listed in I WILL PWN U. Acquiring all the skills in this series won’t make you an expert at art scene hustling, but at the very least you’ll deserve a 4 Square badge.

For updates to the list of skills featured in I WILL PWN U, visit Here is a Fantasy on Twitter.

Art scene skill #1: Never paying for museum admission.

You know how MoMA’s ticket prices are going up again? Yeah, you know, but you just don’t care because you haven’t had to pay for museum admission in years.

Although rarely displayed on any museum signage, museum employees and university faculty are given free admission to any museum in the States. You’ll just need to show your staff ID or business card at the front desk. Members of the press, just like museum employees or university faculty, can find their way into museums by showing off their paper or plastic cred.

I shouldn’t advocate using expired IDs or friends’ IDs in order to gain free admission, but it’s such an easy trick to pull off.

The most difficult NY art museum to get into without a hitch? The Whitney.

The Whitney’s more uptight than MoMA, the Met, or the New Museum, and whenever I go there, the staff usually wants to see a driver’s license in addition to my business card. The last time I showed up, I was told to bring one of those plastic security badges instead of my business card, but I had to explain to her that my museum doesn’t use them. “We’re from the Midwest, you see. We don’t even lock our doors!” That Midwestern tomfoolery worked.

Art scene fail: #1 Asking your friend who wants to see some gallery shows if there’s an admission fee.

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  1. […] the blog, expect more I WILL PWN U, a series describing underrated art scene skills like knowing the difference between Juergen Teller […]

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